Swirling In the Vortex (or, You Get What You Need)
Did you ever experience a day or month or year where everything you needed just seemed to fall into place for you? Mom calls it good karma — the right things happening to good people. Zach calls it “swirling in the vortex:” the chain reaction of positivity where one good thing leads to another.
At the risk of sounding too “woo-woo” new age-y, I think the universe lets you know when you’re on the right path or when you’ve been led astray. It gives you what you need when you need it, no matter if you are able to realize yourself what you need at any given moment.
Once, for example, I decided to move from Asheville, North Carolina to San Diego, California on a whim. I gave Zach six days notice, packed all my belongings into my beat up Honda Civic and rattled down Interstate 40 off into the unknown. I felt so confident at first, milking the juicy spontaneity of youth. The universe had different plans for me. In Arkansas, I nearly died from sliding around in a deadly ice storm caused by the Polar Vortex. In that lonesome northern square of Texas, I drove past the only gas station for a hundred miles and almost got stranded on the side of the road. When I got to the desert of New Mexico and Arizona, a strong wind pushed against my feeble vehicle for two days straight.
The universe was telling me I was on the wrong path, that I needed to go back. At first I didn’t listen, but when I was rejected from 50 jobs in 3 months time, I realized what the universe was trying to tell me. Back in Asheville as soon as possible, I moved in with my best friend, got a job right away, and reconnected with Zach after abandoning him. He and I ended up moving to New Hampshire together, which is where I got my first job in politics organizing for Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign, launching my career into the political/advocacy space.
I’ve been swirling in the vortex for over a year now. On a whim, Zach and I decided to visit Bellingham last July. We liked it well enough, so, also on a whim, we put in an application on a duplex rental. We were immediately approved. Within a week, Zach had a new job in Bellingham and we moved up. A few months later, I got my dream job doing repro rights advocacy work for an organization I admire. We bought a house on five acres in the mountains. A sweet, well-behaved, adorable dog literally walked into our lives out of nowhere. My writing life is taking off with 2 pieces published since May and one more in queue to be published in September.
I’m not saying all this to honk my own horn, but to illustrate that when I open myself up to the possibility of newness and a life of abundance and joy, I found that life. Things have been better than good.
Until last Monday.
Anyone who knows me well knows that I often trip or fall over literally nothing. I was minding my own business walking around on Monday last week. I rolled my ankle on some unidentified hurdle, and severely fucked up my foot. I had to get an x-ray — not broken, thank god — and was bedridden for three days. I could finally walk around a little bit last Thursday, but then pushed it way too far on Friday. I couldn’t stand to sit still: too many things on the to do list, too many errands to run, dishes to wash, meetings to attend, weeds to pull, chickens to tend.
My ambition did me in. I re-injured the foot and have been on my ass ever since.
As I type this post, I’m lying horizontally on my bed beside my dog and a pile of old notebooks, my injured leg elevated on top of a stack of laundry baskets and pillows.
What are you trying to tell me, universe? I asked. Why are you putting up this road block between me and my goals?
It’s resounding reply: “Chill the fuck out.”
As usual, the universe is right. I needed a reminder to just relax and enjoy the fruits of my labor for a bit before diving into the fall.
So, that’s what I plan to do.